July 2011
24 posts
Brass Ring
Marni’s World: Last night, I did it. I achieved the impossible. They said it couldn’t be done, that there wasn’t a chance in hell. Wait it out, they said, you’ll get nowhere now. ..But, I proved them wrong, I proved them all wrong! AH HA HA! Real World: Caught a cab in a torrential downpour.
Proper Attire
Marni’s World: When going out in the rain on a 90 degree day, I always suggest wearing a bathing suit, swim shoes and goggles. Real World: But if you have to go to an office, you are most certainly out of luck. Have fun squishing around the office in your sandals!
WARNING
Marni’s World: Excessive Heat Warnings Today for Manhattan. Symptoms include, but are not limited to: Sweating like a Banshee, Turning Bright Red, Frizzy Hair, Throwing Oneself into Public Fountains, Pouring SnoCones Down One’s Shirt, Lurking in Starbucks Under A/C Units, the Urge to Rip Off One’s Clothes, and a Sudden Desire to Move to Alaska. Try to Avoid the Following...
AC
Marni’s World: Hello there! My name is Nanook of the North, welcome to my igloo. Can I interest you in a popsicle? Gelato? Sno-Cone? Ice Coffee? Oh just sit right down here on the ice chunk and let the Arctic winds ruffle your hair. Don’t mind Paul, he’s a tame polar bear, he just wants to go swimming with you. Fancy a dip in the ice water? Real World: 1,000 degrees outside...
Very Hungry
Marni’s World:
“On Saturday, he ate through one piece of chocolate cake, one ice-cream cone, one pickle, one slice of Swiss cheese, one slice of salami, one lollipop, one piece of cherry pie, one sausage, one cupcake, and one slice of watermelon. That night he had a stomach ache.”
Story of my life
Real World:
The Very Hungry Caterpillar, By Eric Carle
Dana & the Jets Part II
Marni: Get on your secret and imaginary jet and come here! Dana: My imaginary pilot got super drunk last night and didnt come home Marni: Bastard!! Dana: I know Dana: So I called his imaginary co-pilot and he said the last he saw him was at Night Trips (the ONLY Oklahoma city strip club) at 2:30 am getting a lapdance from an imaginary stripper with my imaginary money Dana: It sounded like an...
Anonymous asked: How does one from your fan club access your new website Le Peanut Gallery"?
Feelings
Marni’s World:
Hope, Fear, Love, Anxiety, Happiness, Sadness, Nostalgia, Anticipation, Excitement, Joy, Fatigue, Optimism, Pessimism, Sentimentality, Longing, Eagerness, Hunger. Real World: Just some emotions I’m experiencing whilst waiting to see Harry Potter tonight.
Love
Marni’s World:
Oh you beautiful thing. Your warm, bright circle face greets me in the morning and puts a spring in my step, a song in my heart, a lightness in my soul. You brighten up my day and assure me that yes, it’s all right. Real World Friday bagel.
Ow
Marni’s World:
There is a tiny, tiny man with a jackhammer. He is trapped deep inside my brain. He is currently trying to Shawshank his way out through my eyes.
He is a jerk.
Real World:
Migraine
Long Day
Marni’s World:
It has to be at least 2012 by now.
Real World:
Nope, not even 5 o’ clock.
Le Peanut Gallery →
I would just like the world to know that I have another, brand new, bouncing baby blog. It is called Le Peanut Gallery. If you like Fine Art, or being a jerk about Fine Art, well, hot damn, this is the place for you!
Observation
City World:
Tourists look up in wonder at buildings.
Country World:
Tourists look up in wonder at stars.
Press 1
Marni’s World:
Dear Customer Service Robot, I know you didn’t always want to be a customer service robot. I bet when you were just a baby bit of scrap metal and gigabytes, you wanted more. You wanted to be a space robot , an underwater robot or heck, even a roomba. But no, fate was cruel and you ended up where no human or bot ever wants to be; in customer service. So I know it must be...
Commute
Real World:
Down four flights of stairs, across the street, down one flight of stairs, down a hallway, down two more flights of stairs, through the doors, through the tunnels, back out through the doors, up a flight of stairs, down a hallway, up another flight of stairs, across four avenues and up another flight of stairs. …Just getting to work. Marni’s World: I feel like I should...
Fourth
Marni’s World: The True Meaning of Fourth of July When our forefathers founded this country they knew we had to get some shit straight. For one, we’d be drinking coffee, not tea, thankyouverymuch. We’d lose the extra “u” in words like rumour and colour beause they were stuupid. We’d hold certain truths to be self evident; life, liberty and the pursuit of a beer...
